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mel_cherry

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New Laptop [15 Jan 2007|01:09pm]
[ mood | amused ]
[ music | Final Destination 2 is in the background ]

How funny is this?
I've just brought a new laptop for 370 quid.
I haven't got broadband and almost paid an excess of 100 quid to get it put in.
No need mate, I'm online right now for free. How funny?

I can do whatever the hell I want, and I'm going to

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Old Friends [26 Oct 2006|06:06pm]
[ mood | indescribable ]
[ music | Punk Music Stuff (bit loud and scary) ]

Hi Fans,

Sorry I haven't added for some time now.
I'm real shit.

Well, have been working seven day weeks as well as a bit of a cleaning job on the side. And going down the gym.

I am gonna be well fit one day, I don't want to be a female body builder though- GENDER CRISIS!

I'll let you know when I've got good veinage.

Laters

The Cherry


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Little Chicky [06 Sep 2006|05:46pm]
[ mood | sad ]
[ music | wigan pier- I've got the key ]

Hi Fans,

I've got a sad story to tell today, I'm afraid.
I was walking home with Kiddie and we came across an injured pigeon. It was lying on its front and couldn't fly. It crawled into the middle of the road and I thought that a micra was going to run it over, so I ran into the middle of the road and picked it up. It wasn't struggling or anything. It was quite happy for me to carry it to the vet, I had a strong feeling that I really needed to help this bird. I named her Chicky.
As we walked along, me cradling this bird, Kiddie wasn't very happy as we passed lots of young people who she knew. The look on their faces was a picture when they noticed that for whatever reason I was carrying a pigeon. "She's very ill" I told them. I think they thought I was mentally challenged. I carried this thing for 15 mins and we were almost at the vets when it started to struggle. It was tilting its head quite badly. I figured there was a problem. A few steps on I was heart-broken. Little Chicky had carked it. Some girls screamed as I flung the dead carcass into a bush. Kiddie rang away and I followed.
I didn't know Chicky for very long but I had a connection. And I feel a great sense of loss. I will never forget the bird that I tried to save and failed.

God Bless Chicky, Rest in peace.

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De Niros [01 Sep 2006|09:32am]
Hi Fans,

The Cherry has made it into work despite the bets that she wouldn't.
My head is spinning and my feet are on fire. My hips don't lie.

I need somekind of food or something.
Last night I got drunk on Emeralds, now if you don't know what that is you are missing out mate. Half a larger and a WKD blue in a pint glass through a straw you cant beat it.

I am a little bit sad today as my sister, Mindy, left work yesterday and is moving to London with her boyfriend Tom. I will miss them. I'm going down to see them soon though, I bet they are looking forward to that.

I best be going back to work now.

Laters
x
5 comments|post comment

Oh no not again... [25 Aug 2006|02:13pm]
Last night, I went out and got drunk. And have upset a good mate of mine, again.
Its terrible, why do I let evil things just roll of my stupid tongue.
I think she has forgiven me but I am feeling well guilty.
1 comment|post comment

[23 Aug 2006|01:08pm]
[ mood | sleepy ]
[ music | Please someone get Avril out of my head! ]

Hi Fans,

Feeling a little tired today...

I've had a spot of luck and the Special Forces Training has been postponed. Thank God! I can keep my hair for longer.

Last night I went out with two friends: Rachel and Jules my flat mate. We just went out for an indian, that was good I love a bit of dopiaza. Then Jules and I were playing singstar anthems. I am well rubbish. I can't sing for shit. I am a good performer though, I have routines that are un-comparable. The good old Billie Jean and I'm too sexy will live through memory forever. I'm sure Jules just wants to play that game with me so she can make me look like a timmy. The worst one when they (Wilkins and Jules) used to really laugh really hard was bloody "Complicated" by Avril Lavigne, I hate that song but there was a specific bit when she goes "To me.." and they would laugh because I would put my effort into it.

Avril Lavigne is bint anyway, not exactly in the same category as Holty but well up there. Nice neck tie ya bint:



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I wasn't made for the army... [17 Aug 2006|01:06pm]
[ mood | scared ]
[ music | Sound of my heart beating in fear ]

Hi Fans,

I am scared. I have got to go on a Special Forces training day for work.
I'm not being funny but I'm 5ft1 and quite physically unfit. I don't know if you can tell from the pictures but I simply wasn't built for the army. Last time I had army greens someone jumped on my face and I cracked my cheek bone. It well hurt.
Not only do I have to do this but I have to do this by myself. I'm gonna die out there.

Good God help me.
My only hope is to physically fall ill or something.

Look at the way they treated Demi Moore in that horrible film when they shaved her head and beat the shit out of her. Its a fate worse than death....









2 comments|post comment

Bananas and Bints [16 Aug 2006|01:11pm]
[ mood | uncomfortable ]
[ music | Laughter at Nicola Holt ]

Hello Fans,

An awful ordeal happened to me lately.
I remembered that I had neglected to remove a bunch of bananas from my mini fridge in my room.
I was expecting things to be bad but I never expected floods of brown banana juice to come gushing out. It was well rough. The bananas were black with green oozing spots and loads of white shit growing on them. I've never seen anything like it. It well smelt as well, I was sick and everything.

I was just reminising about past entries and remembered laughing at Nicola Holt, in fact me and my flat mate were convinced that we tracked down her mobile number and called it the other night for a laugh. She is always like "I'm not Nicola Holt, go away" blatantly is though, she's got her accent.

If I had got through to her for long enough I would have told her my joke:

Q What is Nicola Holts favourite card game?
A I don't know but for £140 you can poker.




I mean is she a lesbian or what? She sleeps with random guys so she can buy herself new cars but hangs out in the Dot Cotton club with women. I mean, I'm not gay or anything and I have respect for people who know what their sexualities are but she is disgracing both straights and lesbians. Its fucking disgusting.

I would love it if I could egg her. I'd be like "Holty, look out!" and she'd be like "Oh no, not my lovely head, again" I'd love to see her wipe the yoke of her shiny head.

What an absolute bint.

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Truckamon? [10 Aug 2006|05:58pm]
[ mood | worried ]
[ music | Budgie noise (it wont shut up) ]

Hello Fans,

I bet you are glad to here from me after so long. I'm ok, I'm still alive and well thanks.

I have been up to some crazy sh*t since you last heard. The past few weeks have been good, lots of drinking and making a fool out of myself as usual.

One example I'm still unsure about: I had a bottle of wine at the Nemonthron to myself plus various other dangerous drinks about two weeks Monday. I must have been extremely drunk because later on I was dancing outside the ABC (the local kebabary) singing "Hungry men, do you wanna get with me and take me for a truckamon" What on Gods earth is a TRUCKAMON? If any of you know, please inform me. I am worried as to what I meant. Drunk Mel appears to have her own language- as well as having zero decorum. Well I do have a bit of class I guess, I had a Hamlet in the Tem, not so when I choked and spat all over the floor though. I can't remember this happening to be honest. My mates Jules and Rachel told me the following day at work in front of the new starter. How embarrassing?

I off out again with work tomorrow night, God don't let me do anything I will be ashamed off.Its going to be bad enough as it is, we are going to the Moghul (indian)- a few weeks ago at De Niros I saw the men from the Moghul and I don't know what posessed me but I picked up the little one and swung him around. He must think I'm nuts, either that or up for it and to be honest I'd gladly let them put a straight jacket on me if it meant getting out ofI that one.

Oh well, I best be off now. I better clean the house before my parents return from Paris tomorrow. They'll probably find something wrong and make me pay for it, again. Last time I paid £25 in damages to the leather sofa.

Bye Bye

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Hey Fans [14 Jan 2006|10:46am]
[ mood | relaxed ]
[ music | Chillin ]

How you doing. Here's an intimate picture of me relaxing at home in my silky, enjoy! I know I did!



I AM FIT!

2 comments|post comment

The Real Mel Cherry [03 Jan 2006|11:31pm]
[ mood | angry ]
[ music | THE TRUTH ]

I would like to annouce that I will be writing my own comments from now on.

If you don't like what I have to say - then siwvel on it!

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Happy New Year [02 Jan 2006|07:34pm]
[ mood | wet ]
[ music | NOT J McM ]

have you met Joseph McManners? He looks likes a female rather than a 12-year-old boy. I do not understand why this disgrace to his gender deserves a carrer in Music. Let alone a £2 million record deal. It's an embarassment and an outrage. That's all I really have to say about it. Easy listening my foot. 'In Dreams' in fucking nightmares! If that reaches the top 10 stop I'll throw up.



Don't click on this link and give this fool any more of your time>

1 comment|post comment

[18 Dec 2005|03:35pm]
Dear Santa...

Dear Santa,

This year I've been busy!

Last month I saved a busload of nuns in Angola (326 points). In February I helped [info]triggur across the street (6 points). In October I bought porn for [info]diamond_snitch (10 points). In March I gave [info]triggur a kidney (1000 points). Last Monday I ruled Asscrackistan as a cruel and heartless dictator (-700 points).

Overall, I've been nice (642 points). For Christmas I deserve a pony!

Sincerely,
mel_cherry

Write your letter to Santa! Enter your LJ username:
2 comments|post comment

Suck it and see [15 Dec 2005|08:28pm]
Hey fans,

Mel Cherry is in the house, the dr is in. Tell me your problems and I will help you!

Check out this pic of me offering my advice to some poor young men....





"I LOVE IT"
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[11 Dec 2005|02:32pm]
[ mood | festive ]
[ music | i love egg ]



Enjoy the Yuletide season

Love,
Egg

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Greetings! [08 Dec 2005|10:37pm]
[ mood | horny ]
[ music | I wanna sex you up ]

Mel Cherry here!

It's been a while but I finally remembered my password!

What do you think of Nichola Holt?




According to Nichola she will 'love it' for £140 quid!

1 comment|post comment

[10 Aug 2005|07:41pm]
[ mood | energetic ]
[ music | in my head bells are ringing ]

Word of the week: gratitude

this is important.

that is all.

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